


New Normal

by Tom_Tomorrow



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Big Sister Alex Danvers, Big Sister Maggie Sawyer, F/F, Gen, Mental Instability, Sanvers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-05
Updated: 2017-08-05
Packaged: 2018-12-11 14:35:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11716395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tom_Tomorrow/pseuds/Tom_Tomorrow
Summary: Their apartment is dark.And that’s the first indication that something is wrong.Because the lights are never off now.//Comforting was never Maggie's forte.





	New Normal

**Author's Note:**

> Well. I know I said I was going to update one more step. But then this happened. So, oh well.

Their apartment is dark.

And that’s the first indication that something is wrong. 

Because the lights are never off now. 

Not after Kara had moved in. 

No, after she’d moved in, every bulb would glow with neon fluorescence, lighting every corner, every crevice, every dark spot. 

Illuminating a pathway through even the smallest shadows. 

The detective is sure that her and Alex’s electricity bill will have skyrocketed by the end of the month.

But if this what Kara needed, and God was it warranted, then she and Alex would not hesitate to give it to her. 

The wooden floor creaks as she steps further into the darkened room, hand hovering next to the light switch.

A cursory glance around the living room confirms that it is in fact empty. 

Where is she?

The blonde had been living with them for almost a week now, after it had quickly been established that she can’t handle being home alone. 

Because Maggie remembers that phone call.

The one that came days after Kara insisted she was fine.

The one from a concerned neighbor with a noise complaint. 

They found her beating down her kitchen wall, insisting someone was talking to her from the other side.

There wasn’t. 

And after that Alex refused to believe anything Kara had to say in terms of being ‘fine’.

The condition then had been, after Alex had wiped the blonde’s tears away, that if Kara wasn’t going to talk to the therapist at least to talk to her.

They hadn't gotten much from what she'd already told them at the DEO. 

Darkness and voices and cold despair. 

But she's hadn't protested when they'd cajoled her into moving in with them while the renovations were being done on her wall. 

So at least that was something. 

Maggie decides against turning the lights on as she sets her stuff down. 

Checks her watch.

It’s half past seven.

Yeah… Kara should be here. 

“Little Danvers?”

She ventures. 

Only half expecting a response.

And something else strikes her then.

How quiet is is. 

The television was off. 

So was the radio. 

That was also something else that had changed since this had all happened.

Nothing was ever this quiet anymore. 

The exact details of whatever had happened escaped her. 

She was never on scene in the actual fight, only in the aftermath.

Only to see the coma, not so much coma, the other alien had put her in. 

Only to see the machines they’d hooked her up too and Alex’s hysterics as the DEO struggled to find out why she wasn’t waking up. 

Only to watch the mental battle the blonde was fighting in her mind for eight days.

And when Kara had woken up, screaming and fighting, they’d had to put her back under.

Try again under the artificial red sun. 

Where she wouldn't put anyone in the vicinity in immediate danger. 

But even after that, after the clean bill of physical health and the questionable, but seemingly clean bill of mental health, she’d been distinctly different.

But they couldn't lock her up in the DEO forever based on 'questionable’

Maggie walks to the guest bedroom. 

Keeps her footsteps soft and nonthreatening. 

“Kara?”

There she is.

The blonde is standing at the window.

Peeking through the blinds. 

And when Maggie says her name this time, Kara’s arm shoots up. 

Motions for Maggie to stand back. 

So the detective acquiesces, waits for an explanation, but Kara doesn’t offer her one.

Instead, remains rigid at the glass. 

“Kara, what’s wrong?”

She questions.

Because Kara isn’t normally like this.

Because, yes, things have changed since the attack.

But she still went to CatCo. Still went to the DEO.

Still did Supergirl activities, though the latter was far and few in between. 

Did a lot of things that didn’t include standing alone in a dark apartment looking out of the window.

The detective can feel her cellphone in her back pocket.

And her mind is screaming for her to call Alex.

But no, she was going to give the woman the benefit of the doubt. 

Trust had been a hefty talking point. 

Cobalt eyes flit toward her.

Just a bit too wide. A bit too round. A bit too manic. 

“They won’t stop looking at me.”

Kara whispers. Just a notch below hysteric.

And… So much for the benefit of the doubt.

Alex’s apartment building is on the 28th floor. 

Who could possibly be looking at her?

“Mhm. Mind if I take a look?”

She asks, instead of outright doubting her.

Because the last time she’d spooked the blonde...

Kara’s hand wavers, shakes, trembles, and she whispers again.

“They won’t stop looking at me.”

Smaller, tinier, filled with paranoia.

Maggie swallows. Tries again.

“Okay, can I see?”

The blonde doesn’t reply.

But she drops her arm. Twitches as if she wants to move, but doesn’t.

Maggie makes small strides to the bedroom window.

Opens the lower shade. 

And sure enough it’s nothing.

Nothing that she can see.

“You said they?”

Maggie asks.

“Yeah… yeah…. Yeah.”

Kara says shakily, line of sight refusing to waver.

Maggie steps back from the shade.

“Kara. There’s nothing there.”

Soft, but firm.

Never follow along with hallucinations.

“But… but… they’re right-”

“Kara, look at me.”

Maggie interrupts.

Urging the taller woman to meet her eyes.

“-and they’re t-talking. And they won’t- they won’t shut up-”

“Kara.”

This time Kara looks at her fully.

Eyes frozen over like the surface of a winter puddle, heavy with a desperate anguish.

Robbing them of their usual warmth. 

“Remember, what Alex told you?”

And God, Alex is better at this.

Alex has always been better at this.

But the detective can’t pull out her phone and dial her without looking like an asshole. 

It takes a moment for Kara to comprehend what the detective is saying.

Eyes darting like a fly between her and the window. 

Then the blonde jerkingly nods.

Takes a small step away from the glass. 

But is still entirely to wound up.

“Let’s sit down okay?”

Kara’s hands are shaking. 

Her entire body’s shaking.

But the detective still doesn’t touch her. 

Not even when the blonde’s weight seems to drop, sliding her down against the wall and onto the floor. 

“But- they’re talking... They’re talking”

And Kara’s chin is on her knees and arms wrapped around her head. 

Making herself small, trying to block out all the noise.

Maggie kneels next to her. 

“It’s okay… It’s okay… Deep breaths...”

Her assurances do next to nothing.

Kara’s still shaking.

Breathing short, shallow, rapid breaths.

Skin so pale the moonlight bounces of it. 

“Do you want me to call Alex?”

Alex would be back within the half hour anyhow, but ...

The blonde shudders, shakes her head violently in protest.

Mutters something unintelligibly. 

Something that suspiciously sounds like a no.

Confirmed only moments later.

“No- no. No. This is stupid. This is stupid.”

And that was something that hadn’t entirely changed. 

That tendency of either of the Danvers sisters enact some self-deprecating will on themselves. 

Hold the blame when it was entirely unnecessary.

“It isn’t stupid, Kara.”

The alien’s hands twist deeper in her long locks.

Trembling as she rocks on her heels.

And the detective can tell that Kara doesn’t believe her.

Can tell how hard she is trying to focus. 

Can tell how hard she is trying to not look at that damned window.

“Kara, where are your headphones?”

Because she knows the DEO mandated headphones, the ones Alex, or Alex’s father, the detective can’t remember exactly, had created to numb the noise when it got too much for the superhero to handle. 

Tears, more tears, fill Kara’s eyes.

And she chokes on her words.

“I threw them.”

Maggie pauses. 

Registers the words.

Even when they don’t make sense the second time around.

“You threw them?”

Kara’s jerkily nods.

It makes no sense.

She’s cherished those headphones since… since everything.

But Maggie looks around anyway.

Kara’s gaze follows the detective’s.

And her voice breaks when she tells her,

“I don’t know where they are.”

The detective wants to say something more. 

But doesn’t, because then… Then Kara is talking.

“M-Maggie… Maggie. Can you… j-just… Can you talk to me?”

Every word is strained. 

Uttered with painful precedent. 

“Sure.”

Maggie says with a purposeful easiness.

Because mindless talking, rather than outright comfort, that’s something she can do.

“I ever tell you about how I met Davidson?"

She knows the younger Danvers had never really heard her say anything about her life that was directly relevant to the personal side of work, ever. 

Kara mutters something akin to denial.

And Maggie launches into the story without preamble.

The detective keeps up an easier stream of talk than she would have ever dreamed possible.

Finds it easy to ramble, when she knows her voice is only serving as a distraction. 

It doesn’t stop her heart from roaring in her chest. 

It doesn’t stop Kara from trembling.

But Kara hasn’t jumped up yet. 

Hasn’t run.

Hasn’t done anything more then claim that something was talking to her.

Progress?

Not really.

But she hasn’t gotten worse. 

The soft click of the front door opening, interrupts her steady flow of talking.

Alex.

“Mags? Kara?”

There’s rustling from the other room as her girlfriend sets her stuff down.

Confusion and a slight overlay of concern in her tone.

Having caught on to the darkness and the quietness just as fast as Maggie did. 

“We’re in here.”

Maggie calls quietly, shifting away from the trembling blonde. 

Then Alex is at the door.

Dark eyes sweeping over first, her, then Kara.

“Hey… Hey… How’re you feeling, Kara?”

Whispered in a calm only Alex can portray. 

The question is the entirely hypothetical.

Directed more at Kara, but Alex is looking at Maggie as she crosses the room.

And the detective silently shakes her head as the DEO agent kneels down with them.

“Kara.”

Her sister says again. 

And the blonde drags her eyes, clouded and dark, away from her knees. 

Fleetingly meets her sister’s eyes. 

“I-I’m fine. I’m fine. It’s just…,” Kara mutters, tearfully gesturing up to the window above them.

But she can’t finish her sentence, can’t even hold Alex’s eyes for longer than a few seconds. 

Wipes the back of her trembling hand over her salt-filled eyes and then covers her mouth.

Alex’s line of sight darts to the window, then to Maggie questioningly.

And the detective taps her head.

The eldest Danvers brows knit together and she bites her lower lip, but she nods, nods and turns back to her sister.

“Okay. Okay...”

And Alex shifts, to sit down on Kara’s other side. 

The blonde’s hands are balled fists

“Can I touch you, Kara?”

But Kara is shaking her head.

Vigorously.

Asserting her refusal through gasping, shallow breaths. 

“No… no… I just- I just need to pull my my… myself t-together.”

It’s okay to let other people help, Maggie wants to say.

And the hurt is visible in Alex’s eyes, but the solemn understanding is too.

Because the other Danvers sister doesn’t ask again.

Doesn’t try to force her.

So Maggie doesn’t either. 

Even when they’re both an arm’s length away.

And Kara’s head is back in her knees.

“Okay… We’re not going anywhere Kara. We’re not… Just remember we’re here…”

And it’s three of them in the dark.

In the quiet.

Listening to Kara try to pull herself together. 

Try not to cry.

Things are different. 

That normal is gone.

Only this new normal remained.

And they had a long way to go.

But they’ll always be here.

The two of them and Kara.

And they’re not going anywhere.


End file.
